Where Am I Going?

EJ’s job is slowly (or not so slowly) killing his spirit and body. We aren’t particularly happy living where we are. So we have decided that we need to make changes in our lives. The question now is: Where are we going?

That’s the question that has been stopping us.

We have discussed for months: “If we could live anywhere in the USA, where would we live?” We know where we don’t want to live, but we don’t know where we want to live. We don’t know how to find a good place to live. What if we move someplace and find that it’s awful? If we find a place where we WANT to live, could EJ find a job?

And how would we support ourselves? We don’t know if EJ is hirable with his back problems, his breathing problems, his heart problems, his age. He’s only 47, but that’s old when companies can choose to find strong, young guys who are cheaper to hire. Does EJ even want to continue working in a factory? What job could he find that wouldn’t require years of training? (Because EJ needs to get out of the factory before it ruins his health.) If EJ could have any job he wanted, what would he CHOOSE to do?

Last year EJ commented, “I don’t want to get to the end of my life, and discover that I did nothing.” That question haunted me, so when EJ started looking at RVs on the Internet, I recommended we that buy one. Because I, also, don’t want to get to the end of my life, and find that we have done nothing but work–at a job, at the house, in the yard. So we bought one a class C motorhome, and it’s been a joy. We went camping a few weeks ago a couple hours north of us. After months of working seven days a week, of feeling stressed and fatigued, we relaxed. We enjoyed the drive through beautiful countryside. We enjoyed the quiet of the campgrounds we stayed at. We enjoyed sitting around the campfire. We enjoyed talking and playing games together. We enjoyed walking the dog. Ahhhhhhh!

We suddenly thought: What if we sold our house and lived in our motorhome full-time? Oh, it sounds insane, foolish, irresponsible. But is it any more insane than working at a job that is killing my husband’s spirit and body, and living in a place we don’t want to live?

Last weekend, we went garage saling–one of our favorite things to do. Garage saling is like a treasure hunt–we never know what we will find. My best find of the day was a small little book called, Brilliant Thoughts & Provocative Questions. It contained a bunch of questions and thoughts that we were already beginning to ask and think:

  • What is the biggest risk you’ve ever taken? Was it worth it?
  • Are you ready to abandon your hopeless search for security?
  • Is it possible to live life to the fullest without filling your life with risks?
  • If you didn’t know how old you were. How old would you be?
  • What one life experience has taught you the most?
  • Is your life alive or bad?
  • If you could forever eliminate one of your fears, which would it be?
  • What would happen to your life if you had the courage to pursue anything?
  • If you had one regret, what would it be?
  • What is stopping you?
  • Does dying begin when you stop dreaming?
  • If you knew your child would take it, what advice about dreaming would you give?
  • Is it more tragic to fail to reach a goal or to have no goal to reach?
  • Are you doing what you love? And if not now, when?
  • How should you live right now, knowing you will die?
  • What can you do to fan the flame that burns in your heart?
  • What are you doing when you say to yourself, “This is the real me”?
  • Can you stay true to your heart when choosing your path?

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow-lines, Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. ~Anonymous

Growth and change take place when a person has risked himself and dares to become involved with experimenting with his own life ~Hebert Otto

We began to consider and discuss these questions. Suddenly, the impossible became possible. We began to look at our life and our future in a whole new way.

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